The Kirby killing brigade

[kirbykiller4]

Greetings men,this is your commander speeking,you may not know but as i speak a massive kirby battalion is preparing to mobilize on our position.their numbers are in the trillions,but they are weak,stupid,and impotent.

What i need are troops,those who enlist can expect promotions to various ranks,though you will start out as privates,those with high ranks can say whatever they want to lower ranked troops,You can also enslave them.

For every kirby you kill,you will get a cookie baked fresh by albert,and for every mega kirby killed,you will get a pound of space cake.

Will you become a proud kirby slayer,or will you puss out and hide in fear,make your choice soon.

[latimer-kun]

alright capn sign me up and gimmie my weapons, if its a war im in. so whats the attackmethod, i reckon we should setup some calymore traps and ready our men at the base of the pillars of our hideout, its asuggestion...........we should range our men from gun armed soldiers to sword and magic knights. we'll show these kirbys not to mess with our pastries

[kirbykiller4]

For being the first one to sign up,you are now a lieutenant.Now prepare the archers and the meta knights,this will be a bloody battle.

[thebluejester]

Reporting for duty sir. According to scouts they've currently set up a base at the tip of a Castle, apperently on the defensive. Sir, should we lure them out, or destroy that troop of a million with a nuke, but it could destroy part of the Kingdom of Fire Emblem, and that could make them our enemies. It's risky sir, and I say we shouldn't break the peace and lure them out. We are severly outnumbered and outgunned though, but we're not- JAYSUS I THINK I SEE SOME ON WARPSTARS COMING CLOSE! THERE MAY BE SAY, 3 THOUSAND!

[kirbykiller4]

we should never risk damaging fire emblem,they've got swords that shoot energy,and you dont fuck with a guy whos sword can do that.

Private jester,take the meta knights and move to a location above the castle,lieutenant latimer,tell our bombers to drop the pigs away enough from the castle so the kirbies will go out to eat the pigs,then parachute down and command private jester and the meta knights and engage the enemy away from their stronghold,i will arrive at the battle five minutes after it starts,with the majority of the attack force,in a matter of minutes,we will have one with zero casualties.

[latimer-kun]

alright you heard the man you maggots, deploy those diversionery but tasty looking pigs, ARCHERS equip your fire arrows to the left c button, meta knights help yourselves to that box of smash balls. hey you latimer squadron soldiers, you go and make sure they dont try to harm the fire emblems. its working we're pushing them ba...........hang on whats that sound *pulls out telescope* sweet jesus its as i feared.....COMMANDER we're being advanced by a small group of giant kirbys, your orders?

[thebluejester]

How Big are they? OVER 9000... meters! That's huge! Meta Knights, attack the Kirby Squad! Good God, sir, no offense, but I think we should get on the Battleship Halberd and attack with the cannons. I also have another idea...
kidnap Sakuria, the creator of these beasts. It's dangerous, but that's a good way to learn their weakness. WHOA! ONE ALMOST GOT ME! IMMA CHARGIN MA LAZOR! SHOOP DA WHOOP! That should scare them, those cunts.

[kirbykiller4]

the mega kirbies only weakness is their insides,my scientist have constructed what i call,napalm candy,give this to the mega kirbies,and they'll be finished

[thebluejester]

BOOM!
Lawlz, pwned.
Thank god sir. Were're winning, but the Kirbys sctrached me. I want a Band-Aid. Hmm... Me thinks that we should ask do a false retreat, then send in the bulk of our troops.Like in Braveheart or something. Just an idea.

[latimer-kun]

take it easy jester, confidence can be the greatest enemy. hang on whats this..........hahahah, it seems that out enemy has called in reinforcements in the form of mudkips. WE SHALL END THEIR LIVES WITH THE HARPOON GUNS

[thebluejester]

SO I HEARD YOU LIEK MUDKIPS? FAIL! MUDKIPS FAIL! oh, wait. permission to countinue killing mudkips and screaming?

[kirbykiller4]

Permission denied,the mudkips are learning our battle strategy by watching us kill their troops.we will withdraw to our base,while our allies the fire emblem army wipe out the mudkips and draw the attention of the kirbies towards.

we will regain our strength at our base,and the setup a full scale attack against the kirbies.

And private jester,i gained the fire emblem armies trust by promising their queen that she can have you for a year as her sex slave when this wars over.She finds you attractive......for some reason.

[thebluejester]

But. She's fug. And really fat. I can't blame, got wit and looks, the whole shebang! I have a certain thing that the french call, I don't know what.

Whatever. Let's go before I commit sucide.

[kirbykiller4]

fire emblem is anime,and anime people are never ugly,and from now on we'll call the fire emblem land crimea.

[thebluejester]

But dude, she's still ugly. I heard she lost weight though! Is it true she's a monster in the sack?


Moving away from that creepy topic, we're here!

[kirbykiller4]

promotion time! for following my orders with supreme loyalty,you are now Sargent jester

[kirbykiller4]

this is my 700th post,so i wanted to have it in my own thread,anyway

unfortunatly,the crimean army was defeated,the kirbies will be here in a day,but we need three days to be ready to attack,this is bad,very bad,we need a plan.

also,turns out sargent is spelled sargeant,the spell check was wrong.

[Nihongo]

With so many Kirbies on the rampage you may need back up:
Nihongo reporting for duty. I will keep the kirbies off guard with my apples, but I must warn you I use this strategy alot. It won't be long till they remmeber they can shoot the apples at me. May I suggest we use Dedede with a lolipop as bait whilst we sneak past enemy lines to plant the nuke. Then it won't hurt Crimea and BJ can still have sex with the queen YAY! ;D

P.S. I actually haerd she's not a tiger in the sack, but there was this one time... ...2 girls... ....1 cup...on the table...

P.S.S.I accidentaly ate one of the napalm candies, do I just induce vomitting or wait for it to come out the other end.

[kirbykiller4]

hmm......flaming vomit...sweet! Get that tree some ipicac!

being a mod,col. nihongo is the strongest fighter we have,we can easily fend off the kirbies now,we just wait til tomorrow,also i got team starfox on our team.

and jester,youll have to report to slippy's bedroom immediatly...........sorry.

[Matt-Sama]

Do i has cookie now? I got first kill right.
Should be photoshop thread.