|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 25, 2008 14:20:10 GMT -5
We can say they have BUSH.
Ba du Bish.
|
|
latimer-kun
Wii Together Regular
IDIOTS THERE WILL BE A KING, I WILL BE KING
Posts: 1,131
|
Post by latimer-kun on Aug 25, 2008 14:21:22 GMT -5
well, your BARK is worse than your bite
*tumbleweed passes by*
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 25, 2008 14:23:09 GMT -5
Need moar puns...
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 25, 2008 14:28:07 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 25, 2008 14:29:35 GMT -5
we're such retards some times.
|
|
latimer-kun
Wii Together Regular
IDIOTS THERE WILL BE A KING, I WILL BE KING
Posts: 1,131
|
Post by latimer-kun on Aug 26, 2008 13:25:47 GMT -5
they say if you play board games in jail your gay
i was playing scrabble one time in there and i almost got bummed, but i only had one m
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 26, 2008 20:06:31 GMT -5
yeah because your totally the kinda guy that gets sent to jail *rolls eyes*
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 26, 2008 21:17:41 GMT -5
A woman had twins, and gave them up for adoption.One of them went to a family in Egypt and was named "Amal." The other went to a family in Spain, and they named him "Juan." Years later, Juan sent a picture of himself to his Mom. Upon receiving the picture, she told her husband that she wished She also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responded, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
*crickets*
Umm... A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West.He slides up to the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
Tough Crowd.
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 27, 2008 10:22:17 GMT -5
"boo you suck!"
"get off the stage you worthless pile of shit!"
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 27, 2008 18:07:32 GMT -5
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute. “Well,
bullet
Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.
But what does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment.
“Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”
I fucking dare you to tell me that wasn't great.
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 27, 2008 18:16:20 GMT -5
haha.
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 27, 2008 18:31:39 GMT -5
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“
Hell Yeah, we're off topic!
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 27, 2008 19:11:34 GMT -5
like a cellphone would work out in the woods.
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 27, 2008 19:16:06 GMT -5
Fine, Ummm... I GOT IT! Thanks Roomy!
Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!” The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”
The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 27, 2008 19:17:44 GMT -5
Fine, Ummm... I GOT IT! Thanks Roomy! what? |
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 27, 2008 19:21:26 GMT -5
One of my friends just told me that one. Here's another.
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 27, 2008 19:46:54 GMT -5
tell your friend that he is a douche.
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 28, 2008 18:51:36 GMT -5
Okay.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.
Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
I'm here all night! Here's another!
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.
The Russians used a pencil.
America's dumb everybody! And I'm spent.
|
|
|
|
Post by kirbykiller4 on Aug 29, 2008 8:38:59 GMT -5
Fuck you,we have the most badass pen the world has ever seen!
do you? you don't? haha.
|
|
|
|
Post by thebluejester on Aug 30, 2008 14:42:05 GMT -5
I'm about done making these jokes, someone else, entertain me.
|
|
